So Different

Considering the wide success Dr. Robert Marzano has had reinventing the wheel in the field of education, it should come as no surprise that he now turns his eyes toward other fields. Schools have been in existence for about 2,400 years. Organized religions have been around for 4,100 years. They certainly are due for some Marzano-style revamping.

Modern Mona Lisa

My students can tell you this much about me: I suck at drawing. If I draw a cat on the board, and then a cow next to it, you won't be able to tell the difference. What do people like me with no artistic talent do to illustrate a point? We use clip-art or stock photography. If we can't find what we're looking for, we can always modify it slightly.

Marzano excels at nothing, except taking other people's ideas and presenting them in a new way. He renamed rubrics "scales," and teachers "educators." His buzzwords abound. If you want your principal to like you, tell her or him that you plan lessons with fidelity to achieve rigor. I have no clue what all this means, but it makes administrators and district suits jubilate when they hear those words.

So, what about religion? If God created the world, and Jesus saved it, then Marzano will make you hate it. Here are some ideas to make things look brand new without much work:

• Use "Avatar" where "Christ" is used today.
• Prefer "Redeemer" to "Savior."
• "Liege" sounds fancier than "Lord."

Finally, instead of "faith," Marzano for sure will promote his favorite word "fidelity." So, if you are a Christian Marzano enthusiast, you can profess your fidelity in Jesus-Avatar and recognize Him as your Liege and Redeemer. Just don't forget to send your tithe to the Marzano Institute for Personal Enrichment. If you are a religious person reading this and you find it offensive, then you understand how teachers feel about this clown: 

Dr. Robert Marzano